I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
