Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Randomize
