The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
