I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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