i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
