We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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