She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
