if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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