Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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