I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Randomize
