That's when you crack a 10am beer
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
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