I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
