The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
