i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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