I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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