I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
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