Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
no you cant smoke seaweed
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
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