hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
