Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
you mean i was at the winter classic?
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
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