I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
