I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize