But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
