Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize
