i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
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