lets start a swedish sibling band together
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
