Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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