I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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