Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize