everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Randomize
