***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
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