apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
