i don't plan on having that self control this summer
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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