I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
