Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
