why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
