no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
