Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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