i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize