Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
this will be a night to untag.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
