This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
love makes seman taste better
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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