mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
