i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I just saw a hot homeless man
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Randomize
