Where did you get a picture of my penis
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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