Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
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