Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
