We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Success! We fucked roommates!
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
