I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
