no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
