Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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