Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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