Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
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