I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
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